Category: Direct Cremation

Why Choose a Celebration of Life Ceremony in Sussex?

Posted on by Mark Inscoe in Celebration Ceremonies, Celebration of Life, Celebration of Life, Civil Celebrant, Direct Cremation, Funeral, Inclusive Ceremonies, Memorial Ceremony, Natural Burial, Tree planting ceremony, Uncategorized

Why a Celebration of Life Matters — Especially After a Direct Cremation or When There Has Been No Funeral

As a funeral celebrant based in Sussex, I meet many families who are navigating the early days of bereavement without having had a traditional funeral. Sometimes this is because their loved one chose a direct cremation, sometimes it’s due to circumstance, and sometimes the family simply didn’t feel ready for a ceremony at the time.

Whatever the reason, one thing remains true: people still need a moment to come together, honour a life, and acknowledge their loss. A Celebration of Life ceremony offers exactly that — a meaningful, personal way to say goodbye when no funeral has taken place.

Why a Ceremony Still Matters After a Direct Cremation

Direct cremations have become increasingly popular across the UK. They can be simple, practical, and aligned with someone’s wishes — but they remove the communal ritual that traditionally helps people process grief.

Families often tell me they feel:

  • That everything happened too quickly
  • As though they didn’t get a chance to say goodbye
  • A sense of something “unfinished”
  • Disconnected from others who are grieving

A Celebration of Life gently fills that emotional space. It creates a shared moment where people can pause, reflect, and remember — together.

If you’re searching for what to do after a direct cremation or how to honour someone without a funeral, a Celebration of Life can be a deeply healing option.

What Is a Celebration of Life?

A Celebration of Life is a flexible, uplifting, and highly personal ceremony designed to honour someone’s story, personality, and legacy. Unlike a traditional funeral, there are no rules or expectations. It can take place:

  • Weeks or months after the death
  • Indoors or outdoors
  • In a garden, village hall, woodland, beach, or favourite local venue
  • With a large group or a small circle of family and friends

As a Sussex funeral celebrant, I work closely with families to create a ceremony that feels authentic and meaningful.

Your ceremony might include:

  • Favourite music or songs
  • Readings, poems, or letters
  • Stories shared by friends and family
  • A symbolic act such as lighting candles or planting a tree
  • A memory table or photo slideshow
  • Laughter, tears, or a mixture of both

Every element is shaped around the person you’re honouring.

The Emotional Benefits of a Celebration of Life

A Celebration of Life offers something that many people don’t realise they’re missing until they experience it.

1. It brings people together

Grief can feel isolating. A ceremony reconnects people who cared about the same person, offering comfort and support.

2. It focuses on the life, not just the loss

These ceremonies celebrate personality, achievements, relationships, and the unique qualities that made someone who they were.

3. It helps people begin to process the reality of the death

Marking the moment in a shared, intentional way can be an important step in the grieving journey.

4. It provides a meaningful goodbye when one was missing

For families who had no funeral, this can be the moment that brings peace and a sense of completion.

5. It creates lasting, positive memories

People often leave saying, “That felt exactly right,” or “I’ll remember this forever.”

Is It Too Late to Hold a Celebration of Life?

Not at all.
Some families hold a ceremony a few weeks after the cremation. Others wait months. Occasionally, people choose to gather a year later on a birthday or anniversary.

There is no “correct” timing — only what feels right for you.

A Celebration of Life can be:

  • Joyful
  • Quiet and reflective
  • A storytelling evening
  • A family‑only moment
  • A community gathering

The flexibility is one of its greatest strengths.

Planning a Celebration of Life in Sussex

If you’re in Sussex and considering how to honour someone after a direct cremation or without a funeral, I’m here to help. As a local celebrant, I support families across East Sussex and West Sussex to create ceremonies that feel personal, heartfelt, and true to the person being remembered.

Together, we can craft a ceremony that:

  • Reflects your loved one’s personality
  • Brings people together
  • Offers comfort and connection
  • Creates a meaningful moment of remembrance

Every life deserves to be celebrated.
Every goodbye deserves to be meaningful.

Afterglow

I’d like the memory of me to be a happy one.

I’d like to leave an afterglow of smiles when life is done.

I’d like to leave an echo whispering softly down the ways,

Of happy times, and laughing times, and bright and sunny days.

I’d like tears of those who grieve, to dry before the sun

Of happy memories that I leave, when life is done.

anon

‘We will remember them’

Posted on by Mark Inscoe in Celebration of Life, Direct Cremation, Memorial Ceremony, Natural Burial, Uncategorized

This year, 2024, marks the 110th anniversary of the start of The Great War, which began on the 28th July 1914. On this Armistice Day, we recall all of those brave souls lost during this conflict and all other wars, fighting heroically, to protect the deep principles of our good and civilised society.

As a funeral celebrant, I have had the real honour to write and conduct committal and celebration of life ceremonies, for many extraordinary people. I have learned of many extraordinary lives, but today, remember those departed whose lives and families were affected by war.

It is a privilege to work with those families and friends of the departed, families who confide in me and share so many personal histories, shared with pride and love and respect. One particular lady who had reached the grand age of 100. She and her sister had been rescued from certain death, when she was relocated from Mainz, Germany, at the age of 14 and sent to The Isle of Man. This was a part of the ‘Kindertransport’ programme, during the nine months prior to the onset of World War Two. Tragically, their parents, who were Jewish, were exterminated two years later by the Nazis. I had heard the term ‘Kindertransport’, but I learned much more in order to research this particular journey. Sadly, the sisters had to be seperated as they were fostered out, one to a family in Canada, and the other to Sussex.

Many others, whose funerals I have conducted, had experienced childhood affected by the Second World War, largely living under the threat of bombing by the German Luftwaffe, in London, Portsmouth and Liverpool. Some had lost parents and other relatives who had fought and died, or some who had returned deeply scarred, mentally or physically.

We Remember Them
As the rising of the sun and at its going down…
We remember them.
At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter…
We remember them.
At the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring…
We remember them.
At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of summer…
We remember them.
At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn…
We remember them.
At the beginning of the year and when it ends…
We remember them.
When we are lost and sick at heart…
We remember them.
When we have joy we crave to share
We remember them.
When we have decisions that are difficult to make…
We remember them.
As long as we live they too will live,
for they are now a part of us…
And we remember them

Ronald Gittelsohn

(by experienced Funeral Celebrant Mark Inscoe (civilcelebrantsussex) – based in Brighton and Hove, East Sussex. I provide personalised, bespoke ceremonies for Funerals, Crematoria and Graveside Committals, Celebration of Life Ceremonies.)

A Direct Cremation & A Celebration of Life

Posted on by Mark Inscoe in Celebration of Life, Civil Celebrant, Direct Cremation, Funeral, Memorial Ceremony, Natural Burial

‘Ashes to Ashes’ – Following his death from liver cancer in 2016, in New York, it transpired that David Bowie had chosen a Direct Cremation, way back in 2004. This brought increased awareness to, what has become an increasingly popular choice.

A Direct Cremation is a contemporary choice for those who do not want a more traditional funeral service, and often just want a dignified low cost farewell. This would involve a simple casket, the doctor’s fees, collection and transportation to the crematorium. There is then an option for a seperate Memorial ceremony or a Celebration of Life. It is typically the cheapest option, avoiding periferal costs such as embalming, a funeral service, flowers, etc.

A direct cremation involves no formal funeral service. It is usually unattended but can include a small gathering of mourners. The Downs Crematorium in Brighton offer an early morning option where people can visit the coffin in the chapel to pay their respects. This can be accompanied by music, if required.

[ It’s important to note that while a direct cremation can be a more affordable and flexible option, it may not suit everyone’s wishes or cultural practices. The feelings of the close family and friends and the wishes of the deceased should be considered when planning a funeral. ]

Many families choose to hold a seperate memorial event, usually a more formal ceremony, or a Celbration of Life to commemorate the life of the deceased person.

A celebration of life is a ceremony typically held after, or instead of, a funeral service. It aims to celebrate the life of a loved one in a positive way, focusing on the good times and memories made.

The choice to hold a celebration of life often follows a direct cremation, or a smaller funeral ceremony. There is no rule as to when the Celebration of Life will be held, but usually several months, at least, after the death. Instead of focusing on grieving and the sadness of saying goodbye, they then use the celebration of life as a unique send off. A celebration of life brings happiness, usually with an activity that concentrates on the deceased’s personality. It’s about highlighting the joy they brought to others during the time they lived.

In my role as a Sussex funeral celebrant, I had the privilege, earlier this year, to create and deliver two events for an extraordinary gentleman. Firstly, a small family funeral, at the bright, modern chapel of HD Tribe Funerals in Worthing, attended by only a small group of close family.

Secondly, a few months later, I hosted a wonderful Celebration of Life event at Long Furlong Barn, in the glorious West Sussex Downs, attended by a greater number of family and friends.

This joyful afternoon was an opportunity to recognise and celebrate Peters life, achievements and hobbies. Additional tributes were delivered by friends and family, including a charming poem composed and read by Peter’s grandchildren. It was also an opportunity for those family members who were not able to attend the funeral ceremony.

At a Celebration of Life in 2022, I was honoured to deliver a ‘tribute’ to my friend and colleague, actor Matt Zimmerman, at St Paul’s, Covent Garden, ‘The Actor’s Church’. Matt was famously the voice of Alan Tracy in Thunderbirds!