Direct Cremation – Chic, crystal clear, Celebrant ceremonies in Sussex

This year, 2024, marks the 110th anniversary of the start of The Great War, which began on the 28th July 1914. On this Armistice Day, we recall all of those brave souls lost during this conflict and all other wars, fighting heroically, to protect the deep principles of our good and civilised society.

As a funeral celebrant, I have had the real honour to write and conduct committal and celebration of life ceremonies, for many extraordinary people. I have learned of many extraordinary lives, but today, remember those departed whose lives and families were affected by war.

It is a privilege to work with those families and friends of the departed, families who confide in me and share so many personal histories, shared with pride and love and respect. One particular lady who had reached the grand age of 100. She and her sister had been rescued from certain death, when she was relocated from Mainz, Germany, at the age of 14 and sent to The Isle of Man. This was a part of the ‘Kindertransport’ programme, during the nine months prior to the onset of World War Two. Tragically, their parents, who were Jewish, were exterminated two years later by the Nazis. I had heard the term ‘Kindertransport’, but I learned much more in order to research this particular journey. Sadly, the sisters had to be seperated as they were fostered out, one to a family in Canada, and the other to Sussex.

Many others, whose funerals I have conducted, had experienced childhood affected by the Second World War, largely living under the threat of bombing by the German Luftwaffe, in London, Portsmouth and Liverpool. Some had lost parents and other relatives who had fought and died, or some who had returned deeply scarred, mentally or physically.

We Remember Them
As the rising of the sun and at its going down…
We remember them.
At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter…
We remember them.
At the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring…
We remember them.
At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of summer…
We remember them.
At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn…
We remember them.
At the beginning of the year and when it ends…
We remember them.
When we are lost and sick at heart…
We remember them.
When we have joy we crave to share
We remember them.
When we have decisions that are difficult to make…
We remember them.
As long as we live they too will live,
for they are now a part of us…
And we remember them

Ronald Gittelsohn

(by experienced Funeral Celebrant Mark Inscoe (civilcelebrantsussex) – based in Brighton and Hove, East Sussex. I provide personalised, bespoke ceremonies for Funerals, Crematoria and Graveside Committals, Celebration of Life Ceremonies.)

‘Ashes to Ashes’ – Following his death from liver cancer in 2016, in New York, it transpired that David Bowie had chosen a Direct Cremation, way back in 2004. This brought increased awareness to, what has become an increasingly popular choice.

A Direct Cremation is a contemporary choice for those who do not want a more traditional funeral service, and often just want a dignified low cost farewell. This would involve a simple casket, the doctor’s fees, collection and transportation to the crematorium. There is then an option for a seperate Memorial ceremony or a Celebration of Life. It is typically the cheapest option, avoiding periferal costs such as embalming, a funeral service, flowers, etc.

A direct cremation involves no formal funeral service. It is usually unattended but can include a small gathering of mourners. The Downs Crematorium in Brighton offer an early morning option where people can visit the coffin in the chapel to pay their respects. This can be accompanied by music, if required.

[ It’s important to note that while a direct cremation can be a more affordable and flexible option, it may not suit everyone’s wishes or cultural practices. The feelings of the close family and friends and the wishes of the deceased should be considered when planning a funeral. ]

Many families choose to hold a seperate memorial event, usually a more formal ceremony, or a Celbration of Life to commemorate the life of the deceased person.

A celebration of life is a ceremony typically held after, or instead of, a funeral service. It aims to celebrate the life of a loved one in a positive way, focusing on the good times and memories made.

The choice to hold a celebration of life often follows a direct cremation, or a smaller funeral ceremony. There is no rule as to when the Celebration of Life will be held, but usually several months, at least, after the death. Instead of focusing on grieving and the sadness of saying goodbye, they then use the celebration of life as a unique send off. A celebration of life brings happiness, usually with an activity that concentrates on the deceased’s personality. It’s about highlighting the joy they brought to others during the time they lived.

In my role as a Sussex funeral celebrant, I had the privilege, earlier this year, to create and deliver two events for an extraordinary gentleman. Firstly, a small family funeral, at the bright, modern chapel of HD Tribe Funerals in Worthing, attended by only a small group of close family.

Secondly, a few months later, I hosted a wonderful Celebration of Life event at Long Furlong Barn, in the glorious West Sussex Downs, attended by a greater number of family and friends.

This joyful afternoon was an opportunity to recognise and celebrate Peters life, achievements and hobbies. Additional tributes were delivered by friends and family, including a charming poem composed and read by Peter’s grandchildren. It was also an opportunity for those family members who were not able to attend the funeral ceremony.

At a Celebration of Life in 2022, I was honoured to deliver a ‘tribute’ to my friend and colleague, actor Matt Zimmerman, at St Paul’s, Covent Garden, ‘The Actor’s Church’. Matt was famously the voice of Alan Tracy in Thunderbirds!

Category: Direct Cremation

‘We will remember them’